Eve’s Eden

“Why do we have desiderium?” I said.
“You wanted the world.” He said truthfully.
“It was an apple. A Macintosh, I think. You said any fruit, except from the Tree of knowledge of good and evil. The serpent came out nowhere and told me I’d gain wisdom. Why wouldn’t I want that?” I said, suddenly exasperated.
“What do you know you didn’t know before?” He asked.
I don’t want to answer this question. He already knows. He’s going to rub this in my face. Everyone else has. Especially Adam.
“I’m not finite. I AM infinite. As is My forgiveness. You can tell Me.” He reassured.
“Shame. Shame for believing that stupid serpent. Shame for taking the apple. Shame for giving some to Adam. Shame for eating some, then covering myself with fig leaves. You called and I hid myself away. Shame for not believing You. I was beautiful all along, wasn’t I?”
“Yes, my love.”
“I’m sorry for not trusting You. Overwhelm me in Your love. These people, things I place over You, have left me tired. Frightened my time is ending soon. You won’t stay or I will wander far away. I want more time with You, but I’m guilty of such a crime, unbelieving Your love for me. I know that’s why I’m restless. Why I’m nervous to look You in the eyes. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. You may leave me.”
“Shh. My darling. Put your hand in my side. Stop doubting & believe. I love you. As surely as the sun will rise, I will not leave, nor forsake thee. I AM your heart’s desire. I have a hand on time, just as I have on you. I will fulfill you. Don’t rush, let’s go slow.”
“You’re going to let me back in the garden?”
“I’m your garden.” He laughed, taking my hands in His, with a kiss to my forehead.

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