You look at little ol’ me.
You see, darling, your every bit of lovely.
The tears I find meeting my tongue,
I place my hope You see them.
Spurting streams carrying a silent
thanksgiving: thank you for bleeding
my priding death, so I may dwell
forever in the house of God, Your Father & mine.
Wash me clean. Again. Again. Again.
You are My gold. Secret found
inexhaustible when darkness falls upon my precious heart.
When my brokenness was all
I saw, still see, You reassure
this isn’t the end. You won’t give
up holding me for brevity’s sake.
We are eternity lovers.
Father and daughter.
Beloved to me, the despised.
By myself and the serpent seeking
my kill.
Though the liar comes intentionally
planting seeds I don’t wish watering
with salted belief: she’ll leave soon as your life gets tough.
You think she cares about you?
That was a one time deal.
For being her number one fan,
that was a really impersonal response.
She didn’t really look at you.
How could she anyway?
You were a mass of nerves,
unable to utter anything except
your name. Classy for a girl who is
just like you.
You don’t have fame.
Your own house
Oh, you also haven’t graduated college.
You have a whole lot going for you.
A poetry book selling 13 copies.
Please.
Look at the girl who sings for Jesus,
signed your poster, that will never
be you signing books.
You couldn’t handle it anyway.
You would cry.
You take forever
signing your name now.
That won’t change.
I only wonder what you would do
if someone came up to you in a walker the same age,
and their friend had to tell you
she’s your biggest fan for her,
because she was too chicken
to utter thank you.
Some friend.
Embarrassing you.
But you did want her to know, right?
You’re just like everyone else.
A person in line
waiting to see someone
who inspires you more than she knows,
but you can’t say a word or look her
in the eyes because you’re another face among the many behind you,
wanting to say what Jesus already knows.
That you’re a baby.
You just want attention.
I must expose these thoughts
as there are: lies.
Last night held depth beyond
my understanding.
Love beyond my blindsides.
Friendship born after a wait
to see Your sweetheart face
once again meet mine.
