I Confess Thee On This Dreamer’s Bed

Who I am-

fervent worrier letting mistakes

stamp out my heart

with hate of who I’ve been.

If You believe me, baby,

we know I’m taking vessel dictations

beat after beatbeatbeatbeat.

Paralysis.

Take this away.

I can’t convince my head

this is the end,

no matter what the inner critic

throws from behind

my long-term memory.

Don’t blink, he whispers.

Look at all this commendable apathy.

This is a masterpiece to behold, eh?

Years in the making.

You get to witness it all.

Aren’t you lucky?

Don’t pay mind to the blessings

God is bestowing on you.

it’s a dream to fade away.

I have pain aplenty.

Fear to turn away from His face.
Look at you.

Squirmy.

Twisting your fingers.

What, you going to do?

Call for your Daddy?

Funny.

Little girls always have

the lamest jokes.

Go ahead.

See if He comes.

Do I need to remind you

your earthly ones behavior?

Oh, wait. No.

I’ve made sure the sting stays.

Father, I know the sting

bees release roaming this land

searching for nectar’s delicacy

But, worry has waterlogged

my inside of love where You’ve

sought communion with me.

I ask You to be my escape.

My fortress speaking sweet

nothings in the places

liars made sure ridicule

crumbled me.

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