This morning, I awoke with unidentified fear
overload. Staring out my bedroom door before
I utter: They changed it to Spring. I am a little
girl, crying for every monster to go away.
The lie I have to fill FAFSA out alone.
My chair still doesn’t have a charger.
You have to call and ask them.
Pressure I will put myself under.
Someone needs to approve me.
What if I fail?
Can’t find my classes?
Get lost and cry?
What if I can’t look people in the eyes again?
What if I can’t make any friends?
What if I know none of this, these lies, come
from You anyway? I am still
scared enough to sit here,
watching tears fall out
to the perpetual Self,
the one unchanged
yesterday to today.
The cure for pain,
where Your heart is prevailing
a truth neither my heart, nor brain
comprehend. Do not be afraid,
I am with you.
There is a joy resounding each labored,
God, where are You now?
I am sitting beside you, My child.
Pulling you closer, sp I may speak
My desire to waltz in three with you.
My Father, Myself, and My Holy Spirit
beg you sigh no more. For what is gone
after the storm you cry to Me, comes
now a flooding Love I’m leading these crippling
thoughts through unknown territory, proving
Myself true. I am your portion, your strength,
who takes you by the right hand, continually
asking: Darling, won’t you dance in this garden
I’ve tended with every you shed, waiting declared
dreams I wake up when you gaze My affection?