I know I’ve been talking about this song for at least two other posts, but that’s probably because God knows these lyrics are like a prayer to him.
Because I’m good at faking it. The “I’m fine, I don’t need help” persona. Is that the right word? I’m good at keeping silent about how I feel because I don’t know how to explain what God sees inside my heart. That asking for help hurts. Asking for love risks rejection, more from people around you, than God. When searching for God, it is coming with everything you are: fears, fragility, pride, and hoping his robe feels as light as his burden. Which I (or any of us) never are to him.
He’ll lift the veil when he is ready, but until then I am left with the mystery of his love. His desire for me.
Also, I really want to give Sara Groves all these drawings I’ve done of her lyrics. And hug her. And say thank you.
That’s be one heck of a mystery if she ever stumbled upon this. I think I’d conclude it was God, though.