for His sake

we were under
gray sky, when
she asked, “what
do you think our job
is?” in the silence
following, pride
rose in my heart.
i knew the answer
& the smile spread
according—but
she answered first,
“to be a good daughter.
mother, friend.” staring
out the green, i said,
“to show Christ,” a
smile only God
discerned upon my
face. in that moment,
i wanted this my truth.
i forget, have forgotten,
will forget how this life
is nothing short a privilege—
falling in love with whom
bore my, “i got this.” —

a few weeks (okay, may have been a month ago), i laid in a field & talked about what are job would be in heaven/is on earth with my friend. as i listened to both our answers, i found myself in awe. because seriously, who doesn’t want to sing to Jesus all day. or write poetry. or create beautiful art. but i can’t help but think Jesus doesn’t look at job the way I do.

by the world’s standards, my job should be getting a degree, which leads to something I can support myself with. today, i watched this message about finishing well. Leaning on Jesus. I watched another about how Jesus is the good Samaritan & soaking up Him, like Mary instead of freaking out like Martha, is the best thing I could do.

it shouldn’t be a job to show Christ. Be a good mother, daughter, friend.

it’s a gift to love as Jesus loves. But I must continually receive His love.

Until I know, not only in my head, but my heart overwhelms hearing:

I am whom Jesus loves.

(side note: both these messages Judah preached had me tearing up…so, so straight to my heart. and captivating.)

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