with forgiving silence

I walk in the door,
turn on the light & look
up. the bulb has burn-

ed out. well, this is
more intimate—I
can’t help wanting

tell You truth I’m
keeping, a secret
my body trembles

admit: I want sorrow
closer than blessed
(happy)ness given

to pure in heart.
I know too well taste
of tears, salt for thought

passing through nights.
no one understands me.
i can’t believe i did that.

oh Jesus, I shouldn’t be
joyous, please condemn
me. look at how human

I am! the past shadows
fall—Jesus, did I do that?
Or is my flesh flaring up

in war—my eyes
silently drawing down
surrender to sleep

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