pave the way
so I may see
myself through Your
eyes, help me accept
Your love. Let me open
my arms and embrace You.
You are wonderful and faithful
to woo me beyond my every no.
Don’t let me go – let me dance with you
right here. Don’t mind
the tears, this is all new and the lies I
don’t deserve this – I don’t deserve such
mercy to cover me though I will turn
Tired doesn’t even begin to describe how I feel lately. Weary maybe. Worn out. Burned out. I have not come through on two things this month (one including reading a book I’m supposed to help launch) so far. In between telling God, I’m going to do it. Yep, got distracted again. I don’t have the energy.
I keep doing devotionals (whispers of rest. I can’t quit it.) and reading the bible. And rambling to God about how things don’t make sense and blah blah blah. Not the things are supposed to make sense but I need I don’t know, more than physical rest. Though some solid rest would be cool. Can I have a hug? A looooong one. I know you’re here, God. I know it. I know it. I’m just a little I don’t even know. And all ELLIE HOLCOMB TICKETS SOLD OUT, ughhh God, I want to go! Please. Please please please. PLEASE. I’m going to wait and pray to you.
In the midst of all my rambling there has been:
1. Yellow butterflies. I know they mean guidance. Always come when I’m least expecting.
2. An explosion of snacks brought from dad from his last trip. Included: trail mix, candy bars, pretzels (eating soon) and chips.
3. Oreo shake from my mom.
4. Pop pies and laughter from my brother until my sides hurt.
5. My dad getting me a window seat for trip to Texas in 9 days.
6. Late night Voxer (this is a very interesting app where I feel like I’m a cop with a walkie talkie but nice to be share our hearts and come back later if we need to) with a friend. So much laughter and goodness last night.
7. Anticipation to hug another friend in 9 days and possibly sing all Ellie until I can’t 😂 and possibly this:
8. I can pave the road for you. seriously so catchy and I love how she dances with her daughter and she says: yeah. 😍
9. This friend coming back to blogging!!!! So excited you don’t even know. 🙋🙋🙋
Thank you again, Lord, for all the abundance in the hard places. I may not always recongnize or acknowledge it because I’m so busy asking for heaven now and for you to come comfort me. Hug me literally. Give me what I want right now. Because I am a child and sometimes I’m wanting, wanting, wanting. Wanting relationships to be better, vision, things. But it doesn’t compare to the way you sing to me. The way you dance within me when we are. The way it’s like heaven has come and I just want to stay with you in this moment, alone. Stay sith me and whisper how you will never leave even as I cry for home. You are good. And everything that isn’t yet is because you either want me to wait or isn’t meant for me. Everything that is coming or here, let me rejoice and feel you burn with me. Such delight within me. Promised for eternity. Amen.