2/1/18

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Day 62

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God, this is how I beat book buying temptation today: 

Book: Come on! My cover has converse on it. You know you want to know you’re unique…

Me: yes, I do. 

Book: so, come on? I promise it won’t hurt. Just one little press of Buy Now. It’s not like the prick of pain the doctor gives you to check your heartbeat..

Me: yes, well my heart is still beating and this temptation shall not overcome so. Nope. 

Book: you really know how to take the joy out of temptation. 

Me: 🙋 this is my hand waving goodbye to you. Bye! 

If I can make jokes out of it, it helps. It’s so alluring though. It has that allure. No, not like on the show Miranda, but an allure nonetheless. All shiny. And pretty. And new. 

For the world offers only a craving for physical pleasure, a craving for everything we see, and pride in our achievements and possessions. These are not from the Father, but are from this world. 1 John 2:16

You know, God, when new things come it is like a momentary joy, these gifts from You. But if I’m not careful, it can turn into, can I have more? Can I have something else? Something better?

And the one thing I can miss is, these things can’t have relationship with me. They can’t look into my eyes and tell me things they love about me. We can’t have long convos, these books and me. But I can tell You about them. I can tell You about my dreams. And hopes. And You can woo me with Your love. You can draw me in with unfailing kindness. Lovingkindness. You can send Yourself through a friend who can make me laugh or hold me while I cry. And a book can bring comfort and make me laugh too. But it’s not someone I can say, hey, I’m hurting right now or hey, would you like to do this with me?

A book can only give me words. Words I can read over and over if I choose. But You are the Word, who will forever tell me, I want to be with you.  And I will never grow tired or done with you. I promise you. 

And that is something, God, I struggle with now, but want to believe is true. I’m slowly starting to, but I need more please. 

love,

your tender haired girl
Ps. Thank you for everything today. Friends. Some hope. And this. can’t stop watching it. And mom getting trail mix. And joy. Help me be more away when it comes to me. C

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