Here I am
In a season
Waiting for grief
To not undo me
So easy, for me
To lash out not in
Anger at those around me
& here I say again, I don’t know
How you can love me. Would you
Come up beside me & hold me?
Is this how Jesus felt—this deep,
Abiding sorrow when he cried.
Father, why have you forsaken me?
LORD, even though it has been days
Since the news I cannot cry. I’m so
Tired & here in this bed is where I want ti
Stay in the warmth, the quiet even as my
Mind goes astray. LOED
I feel the fear
creeping over my heart
that I’ve messed up again.
it begs my question come
to the surface again: are
You as kind when I fall short
of Your glory even now? My heart shivers with the lies: no
one will love you when you fail,
look at you now. I want to be held, to be reassured again & bask in Your love for me in the
biggest to the smallest of ways.
Lord, I need you. I need you to
show me I am the o(ne you go deep for each & every day.)
dear sad girl,
i know you’re tired today. so tired you want to sleep the rest the day away. that hat is on its way to remind you God is in high pursuit of you. waves of goodness. let it overwhelm you. crash over you. open your mouth & let God fill you. let him draw close to you. play with that playdoh, making flowers. or hearts. turn up the music loud and sing in the shower, not caring who hears you.
when you get your haircut this weekend, remind yourself you are beautiful. and when you remember that one time your grandma said you looked a bit Justin Bieber when she took to get your haircut once, laugh.
it’s fall. watch the leaves fall. drink all the apple cider. embrace everything God is giving you right now. himself. family. friends that will listen and pray. that make you feel included and loved from miles away. the encouragement to keep writing.
God is surrounding you.
keep your eyes on the horizon.
ps. If you ever get the chance to thank hollyn for this album you can’t turn off, do it.