have love to lift you.”

without love,
i look at myself
and think: i am
a fool. i find my
legs curled to my
chest, tears pouring
fear i’ve fallen too far
to be looked into—
“darling,” he speaks

fmf prompt: fear. this last line i feel Jesus has been whispering the last two days. i spent yesterday with a friend, spilling out fears (ex. how the lie creeps in I will be forever alone, leaning on the invisible God; it’s such a lovely thing to admit.), being reminded Jesus is on my side, going into a bookstore & not buying any books, singing, and going to see inside out. (which is an actual portrayal of emotions…especially sadness. (side note: i pretty much thought of my brother teasing me forever with sadness/) and did i mention i had steak n shake, a cookies n cream candy bar, a slushy (these at the movies…i haven’t had one of those in FOREVER.) and chick-fil-a and tons of laughter? yeah, Jesus loves getting together around food.. or I was extremely hungry…

all this & wednesday night showed me again how Jesus sees me/ how He longs to be gracious to me. And how he hears me.

how He loves me.

Tasting Bitter Fruit

More than twice have I hid my face,
undeserved, You fill my plate with nourishment & still I crave everything the world is offering.

I cannot hold people too tight,
they only leave me in a fit of wondering when we part with goodbye’s sentiment.

God, how the Devil gets inside,
twisting every line of encouragement
into a rope made of complacency from which I hold so tightly.

Everyone I know will get tired of waiting, but You, God, know the greatest adventure isn’t in my letting,
rather the knowledge that You are greater than those who have left me.