Rejectshun

I face the wall-
sturdy white space.
I want to cry: why
don’t you crumble?

Yes, I know you
have to keep me confined,
so I don’t wander too far
from home.

Home scares me.
I say I want a safe place
my tired mind can rest unashamed.

I run each time.
A friend’s smile.
Laugh.
Hand.
Encouraging word.

They depart.
I am alone,
crumbling with cookie
crumbs I am about to eat.

You don’t have to stare,
all knowing as you think you are.
Human companionship satisfies
a period of time.
Home isn’t a noun, but God, creator
of each person, place, thing I love.

I can’t say I love you very much,
showing how helpless I’ve been.
You’re the obstacle-rejection
I can’t move away from.

A clouded sky condensing
a storm I’ve relived each time
my skin absorbs dropping reign.

The rain is coming
regardless my discomfort
for dreams deferred
to remake my reaction-
unworthy every time
my Father chooses delay
His homiest embrace.